Sarah Palin Removes Face Mask At Book Signing: Reveals She's Really Spiro Agnew

Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin today ripped off the face mask she has worn in public for the last 11 years, revealing herself to be a remarkably well-preserved former Vice President Spiro T. Agnew.

"Governor of a small, inconsequential state," Palin/Agnew told a hastily assembled Del Rio, Texas news conference. "Raised from obscurity by a Presidential candidate who was never embraced by the Republican right wing. Attack dog and cultural and media critic. I'm baaaaack!"

Palin/Agnew told reporters that she/he was the "kind of phenomenon that recurs every 40 years in American politics--a totally unqualified media celebrity-turned-VP candidate with nothing to offer the nation."

Palin/Agnew said that she/he "had learned the mistakes of the past and was not likely to be caught up in some sort of corruption scandal" as did Agnew in 1973.

"I could have been the Spiro of '76," Palin/Agnew told reporters. "But instead, I'm going all the way in 2012. After all, President Obama has shown the nation that just because you're totally unqualified to deal with America's problems doesn't mean you can't win in a massive landslide."