Wednesday, November 5, 2008

California Prop. 8, Outlawing Gay Marriage, Requires Return Of All Wedding Gifts

A little-known provision of Proposition 8 passed yesterday by California voters requires all gay and lesbian married couples to return all wedding gifts to those who gave them.

"If you're going to outlaw gay marriage, then they have to return the presents," Andrew Lichtenbach, a spokesman for Yes On 8 told a hastily assembled West Hollywood news conference. "Fair is fair."

Lichtenbach told reporters that he "empathized" with gay couples that had registered for china patterns, glassware, or other gifts. "But the law is the law, and the California state constitution now requires all those things to go back to the stores they came from."

Lichtenbach said that supporters of Prop. 8 weren't trying to be "punitive. It's just that the privileges of marriage are now reserved under California law for heterosexuals, and that includes wedding gifts."

Proposition 8 does not specify whether gay couples will be allowed to keep "photo albums, DVDs, or imprinted matchboxes or yarmulkes," Lichtenbach said. "This is something that the California Supreme Court will have to rule on."

Lichtenbach said that gay couples would be allowed to keep "up to three slices of frozen wedding cake for their first anniversary celebrations. We may be bigoted, homophobic, and uninterested in the humanity of our fellow men and women. But we aren't heartless."

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