Kansas freshman Congresswoman Lynn Jenkins today told a hastily assembled Wichita news conference that she had been "viciously misquoted" by a "vast left-wing media conspiracy" and that she had not said the Republicans were looking for a "great white hope" to run against President Barack Obama in 2012.
"I never said great white hope," Jenkins told reporters. "What I said was, I was so lonely and deprived of male physical contact that I was hoping to receive a waist-high grope from someone, preferably a man built like one of those Chippendales or Thunder Down Under guys you see in Vegas."
Jenkins, who has lived in Kansas all her life, told reporters that "I meant nothing against President Obama. My remark wasn't even political in nature. I'm just a lonely, lonely woman and the Congressmen I've met in D.C. are far more interested in having affairs with their underage pages than with a mature, robust woman like myself."
The Congresswoman told reporters that "while my comment obviously had been twisted by the liberal media to imply that we needed a white man to beat Obama, my intent was purely sexual. One waist-high grope and I'll be feeling like my old self again."
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