Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Madoff Girlfriend Claims Her Hair Was Victim Of Ponzi Scheme

Sheryl Weinstein, self-described mistress of disgraced financier Bernie Madoff, today told a hastily assembled Manhattan news conference that her hair been the victim of a hairdressers' Ponzi scheme.

"They knew I had Bernie's money," Weinstein said, "and they just passed me from one hairdressing station to the next. Every haircutter in the salon wanted to give me a different look, because they knew I was an extravagant tipper. Before I knew it, I had been through a dozen different haircutters, and they each charged me a fortune. My hair looks like it was done by committee."

Weinstein told reporters that Madoff "must really have loved me, because with his money, he could have had any woman, and he stuck with me. I mean, look at me! That's love."

Weinstein said that she was selling her memoirs to pay for therapy sessions, due to her despondency over Madoff's incarceration.

"Where is a woman who looks me going to get another billionaire?" she lamented. "Again, I mean, look at me! And Bernie...he doesn't call and he doesn't write..."

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