Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Manny Ramirez Turns Down New Dodgers Offer Of $375 Million For One Game

“It’s an insult,” agent Scott Boras today told a hastily assembled Chavez Ravine news conference. “I won’t stand for an offer that does not properly value my client’s services. Manny Ramirez is one of the greatest players of the era. I’m still waiting for the Dodgers to get serious about him.”

Boras told reporters that the Dodgers had to “get their act together” and “negotiate in good faith” if they wanted to see “dreadlocks in pinstripes” when Spring Training started.

A spokesman for the Dodgers, asked whether he thought that Boras was expecting too much for a player of Ramirez’s caliber, offered a terse “no comment.”

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