Kurt Warner Loses Super Bowl, Faith In God

“I can’t believe He did this to me,” losing Super Bowl quarterback Kurt Warner told a hastily assembled Phoenix, Arizona news conference. “I mean, I can understand the Holocaust, illness and disease, and suicide bombers in the Middle East and everything. But how could he let me lose in the last 35 seconds? I mean, that could cost me the Hall of Fame. I’m done with God, church, everything. Thank you.”