Esterhaz Sues DNC, GOP – “Black Beats Woman, Loses To Woman Was My Idea”

Legendary Hollywood screenwriter Joe Eszterhas, who penned “Showgirls”, “Jagged Edge”, and “Basic Instinct” among many other major hits, today sued the Democratic National Committee and the Republican Party for plagiarism, on the grounds that the current Presidential campaign was identical to a screenplay he had written in 1996.

“It was my idea all the way,” the controversial screenwriter told a hastily assembled Pacific Palisades, California news conference. “A woman is nominated for President, a black man beats her, and then another woman comes out of nowhere and beats the black man.

“I came up with that back when Clinton was involved with Monica Lewinsky,” Eszterhas said. “The screenplay is called ‘Jagged Instinct,’ and it has a woman running for President after her husband leaves office to get a sex addiction treated. She runs a great campaign, only to lose the nomination to a black man.

“And then another woman, who it turns out is also having an affair with the President who resigned, because she’s a really hot governor, gets nominated by the other party, and she beats the black man.”

Eszterhas told reporters that all of the major studios had read the screenplay, which he had written on spec, and which had been registered at the Writers Guild, and they all had passed on it, because the story was too incredible for audiences to accept.

“There’s a lot of give and take between Hollywood and Washington,” Eszterhas said. “I mean, look at all the money we raised for Obama the other night. So somebody must have leaked my screenplay to some higher-ups in the political parties.

“I won’t have my work stolen. This campaign was my idea. So my message to the Republicans and Democrats alike is this: pay me, or I’ll see you in court.”