Senators Warned Against Throwing Gang Signs On Senate Floor

Concerned that some U.S. Senators and members of Congress are flashing signals related to street gangs, the White House has hired experts to examine C-SPAN tapes and identify the hand gestures.

“Frankly, we’re concerned,” White House press secretary Dana Perino told a hastily assembled Washington, D.C. news conference. “The trend started in the National Football League and appears to have spread to the Senate.”

“We have to nip it in the bud, obviously,” Perino added. “It’s one thing to have Republicans and Democratics vying power in the well of the Senate. It’s another thing altogether when it’s Crips and Bloods.”

Perino said that warnings intensified after Sen. Orrin Hatch was seen making a threatening gesture after Sen. Bernie Sanders expressed satisfaction with a veto override in 2006.
“We couldn’t tell whether Hatch was testing his hand due to arthritis,” Perino said, “or whether he was throwing up a gang sign.”

Newly elected Senators and Representatives are routinely warned by FBI agents that the throwing of gang signs on the Senate or House floor is not tolerated.

“We’re also watching for tie color—red or blue is a dead giveaway,” Perino said. “And jewelry and dress style. When we see a Senator with a 5-to-10 pound piece of gold jewelry around his neck, no belt around his pants and his boxers visible on C-SPAN 2, we have reason to believe he’s bagging, sagging, and flagging. We’re not down with that.”

The concern was raised with first-year players at the recent rookie symposium, and a video on the dangers of gangs was shown to every player in the league last year. They are shown a video of Sen. Ted Kennedy apparently throwing down a sign identified with the 18th St. Crips set, although Perino acknowledged the Senator might simply have been indicating to a Senate page his desire for an additional Heineken, served in a frosty cold mug emblazoned with the Crips sign.