Hanover, N.H. -- Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, the frontrunner as the 2008 nomination campaign begins here, told donors on a hastily arranged early morning conference call today she work up early this morning from “the scariest nightmare I ever had.”
According to Clinton, who, according to polls, owns a commanding lead in New Hampshire’s primary over challengers Barack Obama and Jonathan Edwards, “I dreamt it was early June and the whole thing was over and I lost. It was the worst dream ever! I wasn’t conceding defeat, and even though I’d won the popular vote and some of the most important states like Ohio and Michigan, all the superdelegates deserted me for some guy I never heard of. Ojama? Okama? Who is that guy?”
When reminded that challenger Barack Obama was, like Clinton, a U.S. Senator, and from her home state of Illinois, friends say she shook her head and replied, “There are 100 Senators. I can’t expect to know all of them. Which one is he again?”
Clinton elaborated on her nightmare as more details came to mind. “In the dream, he just kept getting supporters and raising more money than me. And the people seemed to like him, even though nobody knew what he stood for. He went through the whole primary season without taking a single position on anything! Can you imagine?
“And at the end of the race—you know, in early June, right around the time that Bobby Kennedy—never mind, I don’t want to get into that. So it’s June, and I lost, and I had to go groveling to this guy I’ve never heard of, to see if maybe, pretty please with sugar on top, I could be his Vice Presidential running mate. I mean, can you believe that?” she concluded, in utter disbelief.
“I can’t stay on the phone,” she told her supporters, who cooed and clucked over the utter impossibility of Senator Clinton’s nightmare scenario. “Gotta go try and do some last minute campaigning around New Hampshire today. A win here and I can sew this thing up by Super Tuesday, February 5.”
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